


Crying Blue Orchids

by Bettelort



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Banter, Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Cuban Lance (Voltron), Flowers, Fluff, Galra Keith (Voltron), Hanahaki AU, Hanahaki Disease, Hurt, Hurt Keith (Voltron), Hurt Lance (Voltron), I AM SORRY, I Tried, Keith (Voltron) is Bad at Feelings, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, Lance (Voltron) is a Mess, Langst, M/M, Mentioned James Griffin, My First Work in This Fandom, Orphan Keith (Voltron), POV Alternating, Romance, Socially Awkward Keith (Voltron), This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Violence, Voltron, What Have I Done, angsty, i am very very sorry, klangst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-15
Updated: 2018-09-15
Packaged: 2019-07-12 14:10:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,036
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15996821
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bettelort/pseuds/Bettelort
Summary: Keith wasn't afraid of love.That was something he was sure of. He just avoided it.But he hadn't accounted for the Sharpshooter on their team.~Preview~He felt something hit his hand, and when he stopped coughing, he brought his hand away from his mouth to see a blue flower petal. When Keith pulled his hand away, it slowly fell to the ground ever so softly, landing on the floor and a drop of blood slid down from it to the floor.





	Crying Blue Orchids

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> This is my first fic in this fandom, even though I have been pretty obsessed with Voltron for a while <3
> 
> I hope you enjoy this story that was created from an idea and evolved into a fanfiction on 17k words. Sorry for any mistakes!  
> Enjoy! 
> 
> (Also, If you want to listen to music while reading this, I have made a playlist on Spotify for it! Just search for Crying Blue Orchids!)

**I**

I'll love you forever  
Forever and always  
Please just remember  
Even if I'm not there  
I'll always love you  
Forever and always

**Forever and always by Parachute**

Keith hadn’t ever really thought about the possibility of love. Ever since his father died and he was placed in foster care, he always kept himself at a distance from everyone, as to not get to emotionally involved.

He hadn’t ever expected to experience love. He always saw it from a distance, saw his father suffer from his mother’s disappearance and slowly succumb to his miserable thoughts, only breaking out of his heartbreak long enough to care for Keith, who at the time had no idea what was going on.

But after his father died, Keith broke himself away from love, realizing what it had done to his father. He locked his heart away from feeling most things, afraid to be vulnerable to the world. The foster system only made it so much clearer;

Love wasn’t something to be played with.

There weren’t many people willing to simply loan their heart out to every other person. It was like most people were afraid of everything that came with it.

Afraid of commitment.

Keith just didn’t think about love. Much like other kids left by their parents, he knew how hard the real world was, that it didn’t help to be a romantic. It didn’t help with anything, only with screwing with your view of the world.

The first time Keith really felt what it meant to be cared about, was when he met Shiro.

Like usual, Keith was zoning out in the classroom, ignoring all the cheering and the person the teacher had chosen to visit them for that class. He didn’t have the best relationship with the teacher, so they had an agreement; He wouldn’t interrupt her teaching, and she would leave him alone. The only reason he was still there, was because it was the only school nearby his current foster home, and Keith already knew he wouldn’t be there for much longer.

He only had to survive about one year more of school before it wasn’t obligatory to go anymore. He would though probably be forced to go if he ended up in another foster home.

He distinctly heard the class begin to shout in excitement, but he continued to examine the surroundings of the school. He didn’t care what the others were excited about. They didn’t care about him, always making snide comments about him in the halls, about how emo he apparently was. But then again, that might seem like what he was since he had closed his heart of. He didn’t see himself as emo though, preferring the term _cold_ , if anything.

He felt someone look at him, their gaze burning on the side of his neck, as he continued to look away from the board.

Keith already knew who it was that was visiting them that day, but he didn’t care much. Yeah, Takashi Shirogane was some kind of hero, but that didn’t mean that he had to be swooning in his boots over him. Keith let out a snort, and when he saw that everyone else had left the classroom, he hurried up and followed. He slowly looked around the room, noticing that he was the last one out, only just followed by his teacher.

She grabbed his shoulder in a tight grip – a grip that from a distance could seem like a reassuring shoulder pat, but Keith felt her nails dig through his clothes.

“If you ruin this for the other kids, _Kogane._ ” She said elongating his last name, so that he knew she was serious, “You won’t be allowed to continue going here. I won’t let you.” She waited for him to affirm that he had understood her clearly – which he did with a quick nod, hoping his cold façade still hold after the sting in his shoulder had begun.

He already knew of his teachers hate for him, and the very thin line he walked with her, school on one side and banishment on the other.

All the other students were already lined up in-front of what looked a cube on a flat trailer behind a car, and Keith watched from the back of the crowd as Shiro unlatched the car from the trailer and pushed the weird box down onto the ground. He stood in front of it smirking.

“Introducing the Orbit Axiom X,” He said, clapping the metal surrounding the box. The entrance to it opened as he did, and Keith could just barely see a chair, and a screen in-front of it. “The Galaxy Garrison’s most advanced flight simulator. Cadet’s not much older than you, use simulators just like this to train to become the next generation of space explores. Let’s see what you got.”

Keith barely heard the comments of awe that some of the other kids said, instead deciding to keep to the edge of the crowd, getting the feeling that his teacher wouldn’t allow him to even participate in the simulator. He knew that the other kids wouldn’t even care if he didn’t do it either, him having no friends to stick up for him. Maybe instead, he had someone else looking down on him. The class genius – or that was what he called himself sometimes, but Keith had definitely seen that even Keith got better grades than him sometimes – James Griffin. He always made sure that Keith knew where he belonged, pressing Keith down, ever since Keith had moved there only a couple months ago.

He heard the cries of disappointment, when everyone failed at the third level – yes even Griffin – but once again he just ignored them, instead thinking of how long there was left of his stay there, of how long more his newest foster parents would hold out on a lost cause like _him._

Keith’s thoughts turned back to present, when Shiro called out to him gently. “Looks like you’re the only one left. You think you got what it takes?”

Keith had always had some kind of drive to go to space. He didn’t really know why, but he felt like maybe it was because he didn’t feel like he belonged on earth, and maybe it was because of that he hoped that there was some place else that he belonged to. Maybe it had something to do with the fact that his parents were both gone, so there wasn’t anything left for him here.

So, for maybe one of those reasons, Keith went to the chair in-front of that screen and took a seat. As soon as his hands hit the controls, he didn’t think about how the teacher might say that he wasn’t allowed to try, or how the other kids would react. His fingers simply moved over the controls and before he knew it he had made it past level one, level two, level three… He simply moved like it was an instinct, that had been buried deep within him, only to now having been awoken.

He ignored James’ comment about how “The thing must be broken.” And instead focused on the simulator, before he heard his teacher talking to Shiro. He didn’t hear all the words, but he got the gist. He was a discipline case, the teacher said. He hadn’t been able to keep the smirk in before when Shiro had complimented his skill at the simulator, but the smirk only grew as his teacher said that and began praising Griffin instead.

He would give her discipline case.

He sneaked out of the chair, making sure no one else saw him, and as he heard the simulator play the fail sound, he had already made sure the car was unlatched from the trailer and that the keys were in the ignition. He almost felt like it was too easy.

He jumped into the car, making almost no noise, and turned the keys, and pressed the gas pedal. The car gave a screech as Keith quickly tried to find out how to drive. He hadn’t thought about it – it being the fact that he didn’t know how to drive – as he had made his plan, but after getting a hang of the controls, he didn’t have that much of a hard time. It was almost like the simulator for the Garrison.

He didn’t even know where he was driving it but seeing a slight dust cloud hit Griffin right in the face, was worth it, so when he heard sirens behind him, he simply pulled over, knowing that what he had wanted had already been fulfilled. He had wanted to make sure the teacher knew he didn’t like to be called a discipline case, simply because of his past, and his status as an orphan.

It was partly true though. He had punched his lot of kids in the past.

The police lead him to the local Juvenile Detention Center, and he had waited there for about an hour before Shiro had come to get his car, and the police had let Keith go with a warning this time. Not that Keith cared. He didn’t care if he got a criminal record this young – even if he didn’t want to have one, but it didn’t matter much to him – because it would only make it easier for him to have less people to care about.

Keith really didn’t get Shiro. Keith had stolen his car, and Shiro didn’t get mad, he instead offered Keith a second chance. Keith felt something like gratitude resonate in his stomach, but Keith wasn’t really sure; He hadn’t allowed himself to feel anything for a while, so he wasn’t used to feel different emotions other than anger and fury. And loneliness too.  But the last one, Keith tried to bury deep within, and it only broke through in the middle of the night, when he couldn’t sleep, and he couldn’t see the stars for the constant rain clouds clouding the horizon and when the feelings reached its climax he would think of his father. And then tears would come...

So, when Keith felt that surge of emotion, he decided to at least consider the opportunity to meet Shiro the next day. He wasn’t even sure what his foster parents would think, but he ended up not even telling them. They hadn’t gotten any calls from the school or from the police, telling them about their foster child’s massive discipline issues or anything like that. They had had a peaceful day.

Keith didn’t go to school the next day. Instead he simply went to the address Shiro had given him, weighing that meeting against the possibility of an uncomfortable day at school and decided that he would rather be awfully rejected by Shiro, than have to stand anymore of his teachers torture – or teaching as she called it – and he was surprised to see, as he approached on foot, a giant building, that he had determined to be The Garrison, seeing as there was a giant sign proclaiming that statement. He went around the building, finding an open garage. He saw the spaceship that he recognized to be the one used to fly to a moon of Jupiter. He had always been somewhat obsessed with space, if not only because of his assumption of it being something to him, but also because it was constant. It was always there.

Shiro had sneaked up on him, and they had talked for a while. Keith still didn’t understand why Shiro would even help him, since there weren’t many people who would help a _discipline case_ like him. Most people would just avoid him. Believe Keith, he knew.

Shiro hadn’t been lying when he had said that Keith would get a second chance; He lead Keith through the halls of the Garrison, eliciting a few weird looks from people around them, and stopped by one of the same simulators from yesterday. Keith didn’t need much poking for him to jump in and he ended up getting to the 12th level, before he crashed, but Keith did it with a grin on his face even as he crashed it. He felt right at home, sitting in the pilot’s chair, controlling a space craft.

He looked back at Shiro after he had crashed, and Shiro smiled back at him too. And Keith felt the same feeling in his stomach he had felt the day before. And this time he recognized it.

It was something a kin to happiness.

**II**

Only when I start to think about it  
I hate everything about you  
Why do I love you  
You hate everything about me  
Why do you love me

**I Hate Everything About You by Three Days Grace**

 

It wasn’t long before Shiro convinced Keith to go to the Garrison, even if Shiro had to fight to get Keith in. It seemed that his record of being a troublemaker would keep with him for a while.

Shiro had practically adopted Keith, after his foster family had had it with the trouble Keith got in, and Keith had lived with Shiro for the last couple months before moving into barracks at the Galaxy Garrison. Shiro was very nice, and Keith had even begun to warm up slightly to Shiro’s boyfriend Adam – he had become the main part of the chorus behind them almost begging them to get a room – so Keith felt pretty comfortable around the place.

Until Shiro had asked him to sit down and have a talk.

There wasn’t anybody who had given Keith “The Talk.” But Keith didn’t feel like he needed it. He understood the basics of the bees and flowers, or whatever it was called, and he didn’t need it. So, he had automatically thought about the possibility of Shiro talking about that, because when Keith had asked what the talk would be about, he had said; “Just a little chit-chat about love, you know? Totally normal.”

Keith was hesitant to sit down, but when he was about to tell Shiro that he didn’t need “The Talk” Shiro had already begun to speak.

“Just so that you know, this isn’t about to be the talk.” When Keith immediately relaxed, Shiro smiled a little. “I am pretty sure I am not the right person to give you that talk. But there is something else. I don’t presume you have heard about the Hanahaki disease?”

Keith had heard it mentioned in conversation before, but he was unaware of what it was. He had a faded memory of the doctors using the term when talking about his father right before he died, but he had long since buried all memories about his father’s death, in the hope of getting over it.

Even if he couldn’t get over it.

Keith shook his head to Shiro, and Shiro sighed and looked around the small apartment. “I was hoping that Adam would be here for the more technical terms of this, but I can tell you the basics; Hanahaki is a disease for unrequited love. It is rare, but for some also deadly. The thing is, that when you experience Hanahaki, flowers begin to grow in your lungs. The only way to get rid of them is to either proclaim your love and have it requited or to have surgery to remove them, but it also removes whatever feelings or relationship you had with the person.” Shiro leaned back slightly in his chair, while Keith was mostly confused.

Flowers growing in your lunges? It went against almost everything he had learned about human biology.

Shiro noted Keith’s expression of confusion and continued. “As I said, it is very rare, but it happens sometimes. Most people don’t tell their children about it, in the hopes that if they are oblivious, they can’t risk being hit by it. But I wanted you to be aware of what it is.”

Shiro sat for a while longer across the table, waiting for a reaction from Keith, but Keith didn’t say anything for a while. So Shiro got up, reminded that he had another appointment with a school, but Keith stopped him with a small voice.

“Is Hanahaki deadly?” He asked, and he sounded so small, and weak.

Shiro turned around in the door and looked at Keith. Keith was looking at his hands, reminded of the one time he had caught his father coughing up purple flower petals on the floor, and had slammed the door in Keith’s face, when he had seen him.

“Yes, Keith. It can be deadly.”

 

\---------------------------------

 

The subject of Hanahaki wasn’t mentioned again ever, but it was always at the back of Keith’s mind, always ready to come with the newest reason as to why love was dangerous and why Keith should keep away from it.

So, when the first day at the Garrison rolled around, he had had already decided that he wouldn’t try to make any friends. His mindset was slightly different than earlier in his life now though; It wasn’t because he was afraid of being left alone (That’s what he would tell you at least, it wasn’t really true) but now it was because he already had the people in his life he needed. He had Shiro, and he was slowly beginning to let Adam into his life as well.

When Keith met with his year of cadets, he was surprised to see how many people there were. He hadn’t gotten his stuff moved from Shiro’s apartment to the barracks yet, so this was his first exposure to his year mates.

But of course, the first person he noticed to be part of the cadets was James Griffin from his last class.

Keith had to hold back a sigh. He wasn’t prepared to be Griffin’s choice of bullying for another year, but he wouldn’t hide. That much he was sure of.

Which was why he didn’t move when he saw Griffin begin to move toward him in a brisk walk. Griffin stopped right in front of him and looked him down – as much as someone maybe an inch or two shorter than Keith could look him down – and said, “Well Kogane, I can see you actually got in. Color me surprised. Seems like it actually does something, stealing somebody’s car.”

Keith snorted, remembering how the dust from the wheels had hit Griffin directly in the face with a triumphant smirk on his face. “Yeah, it seems like this school actually values talent over actions. I wonder why you got in though, since you don’t have talent and you don’t take any action.”

Then Keith turned around, and left Griffin standing there slightly shocked over Keith’s willingness to mouth of and his insult. Keith instead moved over to a corner, from where he could still hear the instructors speaking when he needed.

Keith didn’t regret mouthing off to Griffin, but he realized that it may not have been the best thing to do his first day of school. He already knew he was at the Garrison with a tight leash, and that if it hadn’t been for Shiro and his position as an astronaut, Keith would never have gotten in. He was a troubled kid, so they hadn’t wanted him, just like so many people before them.

Keith was so focused on making a hole through Griffin’s big head, so he didn’t notice anyone standing beside him, before they spoke. Or before whatever they said, broke through his trance.

“Hey- Hey! Are you listening?” There was someone snapping their fingers in-front of his face, and he broke his gaze away from Griffin, to see directly into blue eyes.

There was a boy slightly taller than him – Keith wasn’t a fan of taller boys, but most people were a taller than him unfortunately – standing right in-front of him, almost leaning onto Keith. Keith took a small step back, just to get some air between them.

The boy had short brown hair, and brown skin. His blue eyes stood out to his skin and standing up close to him like Keith had been just earlier, Keith had noticed that he had a little bit of freckles, but they were pretty much invisible when you didn’t stand with 10 centimeters between each other.

A grin was splayed on the boy’s lips, and he held out his hand. Keith didn’t shake it. “My name is Lance! What’s yours?”

Keith didn’t bother with an answer, and instead continued to stare at Griffin.

The boy – _Lance_ – huffed and left, but Keith heard him muttering something about how “Mulletboy” Thought he was too good for him. Mulletboy. That was a new nickname.

 

\----------------------------------------------

 

Keith didn’t think much about Lance, but he was interested enough in the Cuban boy, that he looked him up on the school’s database. He wasn’t allowed on the database, but he had cracked Shiro’s password months ago – It was literally just _Adam1234_ – and so he could use it.

He found out that Lance was a cargo pilot. Keith didn’t really know what he expected, but it was not really that. He had thought that maybe Lance was an engineer or something.

Keith didn’t really know why he thought it mattered. Maybe it didn’t.

As soon as Shiro came home, and found Keith in-front of his computer, he didn’t question why Keith was on the computer only began pestering Keith for details about his first day.

There wasn’t much to tell. The teachers had all been all for learning names today, except one teacher who simply told them to call him Commander Iverson, who would be the one to guide them through the simulators, and after that Keith pretty much zoned out.

His wording for Shiro simply sounded like, “Nothing really happened.”

After that Shiro and Adam helped Keith move into the Barracks, where Keith had been lucky enough to avoid having a roommate. The other side of the room was bare, the bed unmade. Shiro had told him that he wouldn’t be living with anyone else before he even moved in, and Keith had done a triumphant dance in his head – of course not in real life, because that would be embarrassing – so Keith didn’t even bother with containing his messiness to his own side of the room.

It was only after this that he remembered a certain Cuban boy. But Lance slowly faded into the background along with everything else at school.

Keith simply concentrated on class, and sometimes even that got too boring. He felt slightly disconnected to the world, somehow like how he had felt before starting at the Garrison, like before he had met Shiro, but he was completely open around Shiro.

They continued to grow closer and Keith actually felt like Shiro was his brother. So, Keith and Shiro began to talk about each other like brothers in private. They would go on races, competing about everything.

Keith hadn’t completely forgotten about Lance. No, Lance still swum around his head, but Keith had made it an instinct almost, to simply push thoughts of the boy to the back of his mind. Lance would always try to compete with Keith in classes, but Keith didn’t make anything out of it, instead concentrating on the task ahead.  (Keith would be lying if he said he didn’t make it a challenge to beat the boy in everything. Luckily, he did.)

Of course, since it was Keith that we were talking about here, he got into some trouble. Mostly it was fights. Mostly with the same person too. James Griffin, as always. Griffin had the habit of always bringing up the fact of Keith’s dead/missing parents, and if there was one thing Keith didn’t accept being teased about his parents.

It was a subject he was very defensive about.

Lance never really teased Keith about that, only made some snide comments every now and then about how they were rivals. Sometimes Keith wanted to snort at that, but he made himself not.

Then came Kerberos.

Keith had always known that there was a distinct possibility of Shiro going to space again, but it hadn’t been the forefront thought of his mind. But now that he was, and that Keith had only just found out that Shiro was sick and might not be alive for much longer because of said sickness, he began retreating into his shell again.

Luckily Shiro stopped him from going further in, by simply saying words that Keith hadn’t ever expected to hear.

“Keith, I won’t leave you. I won’t die in space. I will come back for you. So, while I am gone, just make sure not to cause too much trouble, right? I can’t really save you when I am all the way across the solar system.” Shiro laughed slightly and messed his hand up in Keith’s hair.

Keith smiled a little bit, still worried about the mission and how that Adam hadn’t returned to the apartment after an argument he had heard Shiro and him having earlier, but slightly more comfortable.

_It will be alright,_ he thought. _Shiro wouldn’t leave me._

 

\----------------------------

 

It didn’t turn out okay. It had been a slightly still day for Keith. He had been laying on his bed in his dorm, simply splayed out after a slightly unusually tiring day. Griffin hadn’t shut up all day, and Lance had been particularly competitive that day.

Keith was beginning to miss Shiro. He had talked to Shiro once or twice via radio when he had been allowed, but it wasn’t the same as sitting and watching bad movies with him or just talking. The hole in his stomach that had been filled with contentment, when Shiro had been on earth was slowly emptying.

It didn’t help that the last time he had spotted Adam, earlier that day, Adam had looked heartbroken. He missed Shiro too, probably haunted by the words he had said before Shiro left. Keith wouldn’t be surprised. He had found Shiro crying about it before he left too. Or as much as Shiro showed his heartbreak, which was watching sappy love movies and eating ice cream, crying over other’s problems.

Keith pulled out his knife from under his pillow – pretty much the only place it could be, that not many people would look – and once again wondered about who his mother was. He wondered about that more often than not now a day, after Shiro left. He didn’t have much else to do, seeing as he didn’t have any friends. He just preferred to be alone.

Suddenly his computer, that lay open on the other bed across the room, made a loud pinging noise, and Keith knew what that was. He had set his browser to give him a notification every time there were any news about the Kerberos Mission.

He bolted over there and clicked on the notification. What he saw made him flinch in shock. It was a news statement. Keith felt his eyes begin to sting and threw the screen down, trying to believe that this was just some dumb prank or something.

But when he searched about it, news articles popped up everywhere. All proclaiming the same thing.

**Kerberos Mission Failed; Crew Missing, Proclaimed Dead by Pilot Error.**

Keith bolted out of the room, and ran to Commander Iverson’s office, not even caring to knock before slamming open the door. Commander Iverson was talking to some teacher, but stopped abruptly, when he heard the door slam open and saw Keith.

Keith didn’t even wait for him to finish speaking to the teacher before slamming his hand on the desk and throwing his computer down onto the table. The screen cracked, but all in all, nothing else happened to the computer. Keith was pissed.

“What the hell does it mean by “Crew proclaimed dead by pilot error”!?” Keith shouted, not even caring as the teacher nearby flinched at his tone.

Iverson waved the teacher out with a slight comment of “We’ll continue later.” Before he turned to Keith, whose patience was already running out. Keith felt his teeth hurt as they were clenched together in anger. He couldn’t believe this. Shiro wouldn’t make a pilot error. He knew Shiro well enough to know that.

Now he suddenly understood why Adam had looked so miserable earlier. He must have already known.

“We lost contact with the Kerberos Crew late last night. We have tried to reestablish it all morning, but we haven’t been able too, and we saw a crash site. They crashed.”

Keith felt his blood boil even more. “Shiro wouldn’t crash! He wouldn’t. There is no way that is what happened!” He was shouting now, his eyes filling with furious tears – and Keith wouldn’t admit it, but also tears of grief – as he leaned over the table on his hands, standing almost nose to nose with Commander Iverson.

“Cadet! I know you have lost someone dear, but you will calm yourself, or I won’t hesitate to expel you. It isn’t the first time you have mouthed off like this.”

Keith snorted, but took a step back anyway and did one of the most stupid things he has ever done to this date. It even passed stealing Shiro’s car that day. “Then do it.” He said, already turning toward the door.

Iverson looked stricken. “Excuse me, Cadet?”

Keith turned toward him again, his eyes filled with anger and grief. “Expel me then. I don’t want to be here anymore.” He didn’t turn back as he left, packed the very few things he had, and left. He went to the garage that belonged to Shiro, took his hoverbike, and simply left. He didn’t try to avoid the guards as he left, only let his instinct guide him to where he would go.

He didn’t have anywhere but he was almost legally an adult. It wasn’t long, so Keith could pretty much just wait it out. But where?

Then his bike stopped, and he looked up from his thoughts to find his father’s old shack standing in-front of him. So, Keith jumped of the bike, and looked up at the sky.

_I am sorry, Shiro._ He thought, _I have broken the one thing you said I had to do. But don’t worry. I will find you._  

And with that, Keith Kogane began to search.

 

**III**

Do I look lonely?  
I see the shadows on my face  
People have told me I don't look the same

Maybe I lost weight  
I'm playing hooky with the best of the best  
Put my heart on my chest so that you can see it, too

**Death of the Bachelor by Panic at the Disco**

 

Keith hadn’t really imagined what would happen when the drawings on the walls of the caves, the drawings about the blue lion, came true, but he hadn’t imagine it like it happened.

Firstly, he hadn’t imagined that it would be Shiro, that would be arriving that evening, not even for a short moment. Keith hadn’t thought about the possibility of it being his kind-of brother, that there would be cave paintings telling about his arrival back on earth.

He also hadn’t expected his escape from the sight to be done with four other people, one of which was the unconscious Shiro and another being Lance. He wouldn’t be lying when he said that he hadn’t thought about Lance for a long time, but he did lie when he pretended not to remember Lance’s name. (He remembered him almost too clearly)

He hadn’t expected to find the blue lion, that all the cave drawings had talked about, and he sure hadn’t expected to be fleeing earth with it and ending up being a defender of the universe. Together with the four other people.

Keith didn’t want to complain about it though. He felt almost more at home in space than he ever did on earth, and he was even beginning to slowly open up to the other paladins – even Lance, who turned out not to be an idiot – so all in all, Keith was at peace, the hole that had developed in his stomach after Shiro had left, was slowly filled again.

What Keith hadn’t expected was that to find out that his mother was Galra. He didn’t even wonder about the possibility of that before that he had seen Ulaz had a knife that looked slightly like the knife that was hidden under Keith’s pillow.

After that Keith hadn’t really been able to stop thinking about the possibility and he had been tense all up to the moment were it was actually confirmed.

After that, it felt like the last puzzle piece finally clicked and Keith understood so many things, he hadn’t understood before.

This part of his origin explained why he had always wanted to go to space. It explained why he acted out in school – okay, maybe not that much but Keith was definitely sure that him being part-galra had had an effect on his social behavior – and also why Keith had felt so comfortable being in space.

The team took it well, all but Allura, but even she came around.

Keith took a few steps back behind his shields, when Shiro disappeared the second time around. Keith had been so sure they would all make it, but when he had run into the black lion to find Shiro gone, he had felt despair flow through his body with his blood.

He had just gotten used to Shiro being around again, so why had he simply left again? (Maybe “Simply left” was the wrong term. Shiro wouldn’t have voluntarily left, would he?) Keith felt like Shiro was sand, always running through Keith’s fingers.

After that, Keith spent a lot of nights simply lying on his bed, his arms cradled around his legs, wallowing in his despair and his fear for Shiro.

He wasn’t alone in that either. In some of his evening walks through the castle, looking at stars, thinking about where Shiro would be, he had bumped into Lance. The first couple times he had seen him on the bridge, Keith had stopped and simply observed the Sharpshooter, as he looked at stars looking solemn, having activated the star map and was glancing at the stars nearby earth.

Keith knew that Lance had a big family on earth, but he hadn’t ever thought about how the blue paladin was dealing with being away from them. Keith hadn’t thought about it, because he didn’t have a family on earth, the only near-family he had being Shiro, who had been right beside him, so he hadn’t thought of the others missing their family before he lost his own. Again.

Call him selfish, because he didn’t realize that before.

After that he had a for a couple of nights seen Lance being on the bridge again and again, he decided to join him.

He had begun walking just after everyone had gone to sleep – or in Pidge’s case simply retreated to the green lions hanger and had begun working, like the small gremlin they were – and he went still in the doorway.

Lance was sitting the same place he had sat the other days, but this time, Keith could see the stars reflected in the tears streaming down his cheeks. It was a new sight to Keith, because the blue paladin was always so cheerful, always joking around.

Again, Keith should’ve realized that Lance was hiding behind a face of humor. Shiro had really misjudged his ability to lead.

Keith knocked on the door, to make sure that Lance knew he was there, and Lance turned around, making the tears on his cheek more visible to Keith.

“Hi.” Keith said. “Can I join you?” He made sure his voice was gentler than it had been when he had talked to Lance before, knowing that the Sharpshooter’s emotions were a mess right then.

Lance tried to wipe his tears away with his hands, but he didn’t succeed completely, his cheeks still flamed red under his eyes. But he nodded to Keith and patted the floor just beside him.

Keith hesitated only for a small while, waiting for Lance to make any objections when he realized that it was Keith who had asked – Keith, the same person who Lance himself had declared to be his rival – but Lance didn’t say anything to object, simply pulled his legs closer to his chest and let out a loud sniff, while examining the stars close to earth once more.

Keith slowly moved over to Lance, sitting down beside him, while still keeping his distance. He didn’t say anything to start with, only rehearsing the constellations near earth, as he could them by memory.

Lance was the one to break the silence. “You must think I am pathetic, huh?”

Keith started, breaking out of his brain and looking at Lance in shock. “Why would I think that?”

Lance looked at Keith, and their eyes connected, Lance’s blue eyes swimming in pain. “Because, I hide behind a persona. Because of all of us are dealing with being away from our families, yet I am the one sitting here whining and crying, while the others aren’t.”

Keith didn’t really know what to say to that, but he said something anyway. “I don’t think you’re pathetic.”

He heard Lance sniff, and Keith didn’t say anything else.

But Lance began talking. “I miss my mom. And my siblings. I miss them all so much.” When he had first begun talking, he couldn’t stop. “I just want to be back in my mom’s arms, not fighting a 10000 year old war! I just… don’t want to be here anymore.”

Keith didn’t say anything, only sat in silence, his presence calming Lance enough for the Sharpshooter to take deep breaths, and falling asleep.

When that had happened, Keith had felt a weight settle on his shoulder, and he had internally panicked, when he had seen Lance lean on him as he slept. Keith smiled a little at him, and got up from his place on the floor, gently pushing Lance’s head off his shoulder, and before he left, he went to a supply closet and grabbed a pillow and a blanket.

When he had moved the pillow under Lance’s head, and put the blanket over his body, Keith stopped to look at the blue paladin.

He looked more at peace than when Keith first had seen him. It was almost like talking about what was wrong had helped him of his worries for the most part. Keith didn’t stay, only went back to his room, and got nearly no sleep that night either.

For the next couple of weeks, it became a thing Keith and Lance did every night. Lance would leave the others earlier than Keith, where after Keith would go to the bridge after the others had presumably gone to bed.

There they would sit and share stories. Mostly Lance would share stories of his childhood, with Keith joining in with small fun stories from his time in the foster system – there weren’t many – and other times, Lance would just talk, and Keith would listen. Their nights spent together were peaceful, and Keith found himself looking forward to them.

Him and Lance began being around each other much more than usual. It was subtle things, Keith meant, but him and Lance would sometimes elect to train together – even when they didn’t have to. Sometimes, they would also just sit down and talk in their free time, it not necessarily being night time at their traditional – by now it was – meeting. 

Almost every day, he would go around the universe trying to track down Shiro, and when the other paladins suggested finding a new paladin, Keith ticked. He didn’t want to be the leader, that was just what Shiro wanted. Those were the exact words Keith had said to Lance in that moment, not meaning for the words to come out the way they had.

Keith wasn’t a leader. He had said so before. He couldn’t lead anyone. He almost couldn’t lead himself. He already pretty much knew, that he was hotheaded, and would at some point do something extremely stupid, making a rash decision, that was completely stupid.

As it turned out, Keith wasn’t the most optimal leader. But he did well enough. Not as well as Shiro though.

When Shiro finally came back, he didn’t feel like the same Shiro. Keith couldn’t really determine it though, seeing as Shiro wasn’t even walking around yet, still having that long hair that made him look slightly like a yeti. Keith hadn’t told him that, but that was pretty much what he actually thought about his brothers hair at the current state.

Allura had called them all for a meeting the moment Keith left Shiro’s dark room. He had just been standing, getting used to the sharp lighting of the castle, when she had called, and he had run up to the control room, in case it was an attack. Turned out, it wasn’t the galra attacking. It was them attacking the galra.

Allura had tracked down – with the help of Pidge, Hunk and Coran – a Galran station run by the so called Warlord Ranveig. Pidge had been able to get the floor plans of it, and Allura had seen it fit for the team to take it down.

Allura pulled up a picture of the Warlord on the screen and Keith scowled. He looked tough.

“Hey, are we sure that guy is not related to that Sendak guy? They look awfully alike.” Lance said, always ready with a joke. Keith rolled his eyes before answering.

“Lance, not all galra look alike.”

“I know, I know. I am just saying. I wouldn’t be surprised if it turns out that they are cousins.” Lance leaned slightly back from where he sat leaned against the castle controls.

As they all got ready to leave, Lance gave a smirk in Keith’s direction.

It was the kind of teasing smiles they had begun to exchange over the last couple of months, going from exchanging mean comments, to teasing comments, to actually being able to talk without Keith wanting to punch the guy in his face. Keith suspected it was because of the nights on the bridge. Anyway he didn’t mind his changing friendship with Lance. It was relaxing in a way.

Keith was glad that it was more of a friendly rivalry between them now. He wasn’t sure he would have survived the last couple months, if Lance hadn’t changed just a bit in his attitude forward Keith.

Also because looking at Lance still gave him some feelings in his stomach that he was unsure about.

The black lion purred in his mind, welcoming Keith, as he took a seat in the cockpit. Black hadn’t been extremely welcoming to Keith, seeing as it really wanted Shiro, but over the time that Keith had piloted it, they had begun to develop a bond, that was close to rivalling the one Keith had had with the red lion.

As the red lion flew just to Keith’s side, he couldn’t help but remember the times, when he had flown through space at amazing velocities.

Black growled in his mind, slightly mad that Keith was making heart eyes at another lion and Keith rolled his eyes. “Right, Sorry Black.”

He turned on the communication system. “Alright team. Pidge, do you have the virus ready?”

Pidge appeared on his dashboard in a small video cam. “Yes I have it ready. I just need you to keep the galra of me while I deploy it. The virus will shut down all of the systems, making the drones die out, so only living galra will be left. We need to deal with those.”

Keith nodded before remembering that no one could see him. “Okay, let’s do this team. Coran, is there any place to place the lions without them being picked up on?”

There was some crackle of static on the channel, but in the end, Keith made out Coran’s voice. “Underneath the station would do. There is a slight chance that it could be discovered, but it is the best we have got!”

“Right.” Keith let out an almost silent sigh, and lead the descent to the rock under the station.

They flew in slowly in their lions, Keith still not completely used to the black lion. Lance turned on their private coms.

“Keith!” He said, the video-display displaying Lance grinning brightly. Keith snorted, thinking about how it of course was Lance who would smile even as they were about to do a serious mission.

“What Lance?” Keith said sighing, feigning annoyance, but in reality, Keith was glad that Lance had decided to bother him, because Keith had begun to like Lance’s sense of humor.

“Let’s make a competition! The one to kill the most galra wins!” Lance said lifting his hands up in the air, as his lion made a particularly steep downturn.

“Sure, ready to get your face wiped on the ground?” Keith said, also smiling now. It was classic of them to compete like this, and Keith valued the familiarity of it, enjoying that something was normal, even if Shiro was acting a little off.

“You wish, mullet!” Lance said, and cut of their communication. Keith was still smirking as he descended on the rock underneath the galra station, and jumped out of his lion. As soon as he was out of the lion, it activated it’s particle barrier, making the lion unable to be damaged. Keith activated his jetpack, almost in sync with everyone else, and they made their slow way toward the station.

Pidge used their bayard to carve a hole, when they reached the target, and they all jumped through, slowly adjusting to gravity again. Pidge guided them all toward the control bridge, everyone with bayards at the ready. They didn’t encounter a single galra all the way to the bridge, and before Keith really could think about how weird that was, they opened the doors.

The station being still looked like something from a horror movie, Keith absentmindedly thought.

Every weapon in the room turned to them, as they looked into a room filled with more galra than Keith had seen in one place – okay maybe not but exaggeration furthers understanding – and Keith tensed. There was a still moment where no one on either side did anything, but then

They ducked behind the walls beside the door, trying to not get shot, and Keith almost couldn’t hear Lance screaming over coms, “WHAT NOW?!”

Keith shouted back at him. “WE NEED TO RETREAT. IT WAS A TRAP. FIGHT IF YOU NEED TO, BUT GET TO THE LIONS.”

He threw himself out into the open, parrying with his sword, trying not to get hit. He could hear by his footsteps that everyone had followed him, but occasionally he heard grunts of pain as the other paladins were hit.

Keith didn’t realize how much of a distance they had gotten covered, when they had gotten to the bridge, before he had to run it, while also slashing out to protect himself from galra swords and guns.

Keith didn’t notice over the adrenaline, but when he looked down, he saw that he had also been hit with a bullet in the side, blood leaking onto the white of his suit. He winced slightly, but he couldn’t do anything about it.

By the time the hole to the lions was in sight, he was panting hard, not even his constant training giving him enough breath to take such a run in such a short time. Also running wasn’t exactly his favorite type of training. That honor went to sword fighting.

He stopped at the hole, and he saw the other paladins running toward him. He didn’t jump down the hole, instead opting to cover for the others.

He almost screamed in the coms, his voice slightly hoarse. “GO GO GO.”

He then saw that Lance had stopped running right beside him. “What are you doing?! Go!” Keith shouted, but Lance only winked at Keith. Behind the screen of Lance’s helmet, he could also see a coy smile splayed on his lips.

“What and leave you to take all the glory and win our gamble? In your dreams, Mullethead.” Lance held out his gun and shot down a couple galra just turning the corner.

Keith did a dramatic sigh, ignoring the environment for a moment, even if he was still slashing out with his swords. “It’s not about the glory, Lance.”

Lance didn’t even look up at Keith from his kneeling position with his gun. “I know, I know. But st-“ His sentence was broken, as a bullet almost hit him. He managed to move out of the way, but it was too close for Keith’s liking.

“Lance! Be careful.”

“Relax Keith, I got this. You should be more worried about you reputation as a great swordsman, when I win over you in this bet.” Lance was breathing hard, and Keith knew that Lance was brushing off his fear.

But Keith didn’t mention it to Lance, only feeling a little hurt, that Lance felt the need to hide this from Keith. He was just about to say something, when he heard the shot fire.

He didn’t have time to warn Lance about the shot, before it was too late. Keith looked on as he saw the shot fly right through Lance’s stomach, making him buck backwards as blood poured out.

Keith stared in shock, as Lance let out a grunt of pain, his teeth clenched together, his body slowly falling backward. Lance fell toward, hitting the floor hard, and Keith couldn’t get himself to move.

Lance’s eyes connected with Keith’s and he mumbled out a distinct, “Keith, I-“ before he fell backward the blood loss already flittering him into unconsciousness.

Keith broke out of his trance for a moment, to slash his sword across some galra’s neck, but then grabbed onto Lance’s unconscious form and jumped down into the hole. He could feel his hands shaking, as he jumped down into the hole, and was caught by black.

He fumbled with the controls after he had sat down, his breaths coming out unregularly, his hands unsteady.

He was in shock the entire way back to the castle, Lance lying in his lap as Black raced against time toward the castle.

There were people asking him what had happened, but Keith couldn’t move his lips. He couldn’t do anything but look at Lance’s still form, as he tried to stop the blood from gushing out.

But Lance looked to pale.

And Keith felt something settle in his throat.

 

**IV**

We are buried in broken dreams

We are knee deep without a plea

I don’t want to know what it’s like

To live without you

Don’t want to know the other side

Of a world without you

**The other side by Ruelle**

The next hours passed in a blur of screams and chaos. Keith didn’t really know what happened in those hours, but he knew that at some point, Lance had been removed from Keith’s arms, and someone had lead Keith away from the room.

Keith hadn’t protest, only let himself be dragged away, too shocked to even comprehend anything.

At some point, Keith must have fallen asleep, because he opened his eyes blearily, focusing on the roof above his bed back on the Castle of Lions.

Keith couldn’t remember what had happened the night before, other than blurry memories, but when he sat up on the bed, he noticed some weight other than him on the small bed, and he saw Shiro leaning back onto the wall, dozing off. Keith wondered how long he had been there. (Keith also wondered, when Shiro had cut his hair, but he didn’t find that particularly important right then)

Keith began to move toward Shiro, only to feel a sharp pain in his side. He hissed out beneath clenched teeth, and it awoke Shiro.

“Keith? Are you okay?” Shiro said, already getting up and help Keith sit up, like the mother hen he was, and Keith leaned slightly against Shiro’s shoulder.

“Yeah, I’m fine. What happened?” Keith croaked and he flinched slightly at how tired his voice sounded. His side throbbed.

Shiro raised an eyebrow at Keith, his eyes gentle, like his tone when he said, “You don’t remember? You and the other paladins tried to take down a galra base, but it turned out to be an ambush instead. You had to run for your life, and you and Lance stayed behind to hold them of but-“

Keith didn’t listen anymore after that, simply zoning out as he replayed the events of that battle as they came back to him, Lance lying in his arms bleeding everywhere.

Keith felt like he was being suffocated the memories playing again and again, Lance looking more and more dead every time it did.

Keith felt like he couldn’t breathe and his eyes began sting with unshed tears as he replayed them, and then his side gave a squeeze of pain, and he registered just barely that he must have torn it open, and then he felt hands around his face, forcing him to look at Shiro.

“Keith.” Shiro breathed out, and Keith had tunnel vision, only showing Shiro’s eyes, that kept flashing the beautiful deep blue slowly dying out. “Keith, you need to calm down. Breathe. Come on with me now.”

Keith didn’t register Shiro’s words. He couldn’t stop seeing Lance’s eyes slowly dying out and his voice whispering, “You should have forced me to go. Some leader you turned out to be.”

“Breathe in, Breathe out. Breathe in, Breathe out. Come on, Keith, just breathe.” Shiro kept going and slowly, he got Keith’s breathing to a slightly more normal pace, and Keith breathed out relaxing slightly more. He still had a distant look in his eyes, and his hands still shook, but that was what Shiro had expected.

After all, it’s not every day one of your teammates almost dies in your arms.

“Okay Keith, that’s it. You’re okay, Lance is okay.” Keith perked up, when Shiro mentioned Lance, and immediately opened his mouth to ask, but Shiro was too fast. “He is in a healing pod, but he will be okay. Though there was a lot of blood. You gave everyone a scare with how still you were, so I lead you back here for you to rest.”

Keith didn’t waste any time when Shiro was done talking. “Can I see him?” But after he had said it, he began coughing. There was this tickle at the back of his throat, mildly clawing, and he coughed trying to get rid of it.

Shiro simply patted Keith on the back to help – with his metal arm, Keith thought with a grimace later when he saw a slight bruise -  and waited for Keith to be done coughing before he said anything.

“We can go there now, if you want. We need to rebandage your wound anyway. You seem to have torn it up again.”

Shiro let Keith hold onto him as they moved down to the infirmary, Keith only needing the support for the last part of the walk, since his wound had begun to send deep waves of pain through his side and leg.

They turned the corner toward the infirmary and Keith let out a sound of misery, when he saw Lance unconscious in one of the pods. You couldn’t see any of the blood anymore, but he was still too pale for Keith’s liking, but he tried to convince himself that Lance was at least still alive, but it did nothing to calm the thought in Keith’s head, that if Lance had died it would have been his fault, for not having forced the blue paladin to go.

Keith coughed a little bit again, and sat down on one the medical beds, while Shiro rebandaged his wound, his gaze not once moving away from the still form in the pod.

He distinctly heard Shiro say something and then leave the medical bay, leaving Keith alone with his thoughts and the unconscious paladin.

Keith slowly got up from the bed, and moved over to lean against the pod. He cradled his arms around his legs, pressing himself to be in the smallest position he could.

This was his fault. He should have convinced Lance to go, to just leave him. Keith was supposed to be the leader for god’s sake. Keith felt so much frustration at himself, felt so mad at himself, for simply not doing his duty.

Keith got up and leaned against the pod with his forehead almost where Lances was. What Keith wouldn’t give for Lance simply waking up and being there. He almost wished that it had been him in that pod instead.

Maybe Lance wouldn’t even be that bothered if it was Keith in there. Maybe he would worry a little bit, but not much because _Lance hadn’t been dumb enough to develop a crush on his teammate._

Keith stopped his thoughts abruptly as his thoughts voiced what he had begun to figure out.

Since when had Keith had a crush on Lance? He realized it now. He had always noticed Lance around, but had never really talked with the guy, other than to argue mostly. But after they had found Voltron, Keith had begun to almost… look forward to seeing the Sharpshooter every morning, smiling slightly as he cracked jokes. Their arguments against each other became more playful, and Keith began to feel at peace in the paladins company.

Hell he felt at peace around all of the other paladins by now. He trusted them with his life.

Keith coughed again, this time more violent, like his throat was being locked up. He felt like his lungs were being poked through everywhere, like knives were cutting his throat. He held his hand up to his mouth as he coughed, falling back onto the floor, coughing more.

He felt something hit his hand, and when he stopped coughing, he brought his hand away from his mouth to see a blue flower petal. When Keith pulled his hand away, it slowly fell to the ground ever so softly, landing on the floor and a drop of blood slid down from it to the floor.

Keith’s eyes widened in shock as he realized what this meant. He began coughing again, and true enough, more petals came up. He just sat and looked at them, trying to get as far away from them as possible.

Keith hadn’t thought about the talk he had had with Shiro when he was younger often. He had pushed the thought of flowers in lunges deep in his mind, only to be used in absolute disasters. He hadn’t meant that if he had gotten it, more like if someone around him got it. He might not be a people person, but if he saw someone choking, wouldn’t leave them to die. Probably wouldn’t leave them to die at least.

He hadn’t ever considered the possibility that he would be stupid enough to fall in love with someone, who didn’t have any chance of loving him back. (That wasn’t always true. He had entertained the thought late at night, if he couldn’t fall asleep) He wasn’t that stupid.

Well, apparently younger Keith, he was.

Keith scrambled to collect the petals, and when he had gotten ahold of all of them, he ran from the infirmary. He didn’t stop, when his side began to sting again, the fear of what was currently happening to him, beating the pain and starting his adrenaline.

When he got to his room, he couldn’t feel his side at all anymore. He put down the flower petals on his bed and examined the flowers. They were blue orchid leaves. The blue color was just the same shade as Lance’s eyes, and when he thought about how beautiful those eyes were, he coughed more, even more petals ending up on the pillow, making the bedding dotted with blood some places.

Keith couldn’t remember how long victims of Hanahaki lived for after having contracted the illness. Not long, he could guess, considering how he felt right now and he hadn’t had it for more than a day. Or had he? He couldn’t determine, when his friendship with Lance had turned to something more for Keith.

Keith hadn’t even considered how this would be to the rest of the team. They had just almost lost their blue paladin, a person who felt almost like family to them, so how would they react to losing a teammate?

He already knew what Shiro would say. Shiro would try to get Keith to tell Lance his feelings. But that was out of the question. Because Keith knew, had known for a while, that Lance wouldn’t look at Keith and see anything other than friend, if not rival. Even if their rivalry wasn’t serious – or that was how Keith saw it, but he didn’t actually know what Lance thought about the rivalry – Lance wouldn’t be in love with Keith.

There was no way the Sharpshooter would shot that low.

Keith didn’t want to cause grief to the team. He didn’t want to anything to change. He wanted Lance out of the pod, and he wanted to spend his maybe last months together with the team and Lance. He didn’t want to mess up his and Lance’s relationship by admitting his feelings.

He couldn’t do that to Lance.

It would also mess with Voltron if he did that. It was the reasonable part of his mind that said that, trying to come up with excuses for him if he needed it. If Shiro found out more likely.

He hadn’t even thought about Voltron at all. It would also do damage to Voltron, if Keith passed away – he had taken to think about it that way, since it was much less brutal than died, even if Keith hadn’t ever liked the term ‘Passed Away’ since the doctors used it so much about his father – because the black lion would need a new paladin.

But of course Shiro was there for that. He could step in as the black paladin.

Keith didn’t have to worry about that.

And so, Keith coughed up a few more petals, went to his little bathroom to wipe his mouth, where some blood had nestled itself, after being dragged up with the flowers, and left his room, not once looking back at the small huddle of flowers on his bed.

He would deal with this.

 

 Keith spent a worrying amount of time by Lance’s pod, sleeping there and had in the last couple days taken to eating his meals there as well.

The rest of the team would sometimes peak from behind the door to the room to check on him, but they would always find him staring into emptiness, maybe having moved a total of one foot from the last time they checked on him. Sometimes he would even be asleep.

Shiro would be lying if he said he wasn’t worried about his adopted younger brother. Keith didn’t eat much and he didn’t do anything other than just sit there, not training out his frustrations either.

Shiro couldn’t help but think about how unhealthy it was to pen up frustrations like that. (Though Shiro could probably write an entire book about things Keith did that was unhealthy)

But Shiro couldn’t figure out what to say to make it better for Keith.

He couldn’t help his little brother.

Pidge was the first one to really voice their concern about the red paladin. “So, how long are going to let him keep wasting away?”

It was a pretty quiet morning, where they were all – minus the red and blue paladin, because one of them was healing from almost dying, and the other was dying – gathered around the dinner table, eating one of Hunk’s newest food recipes.

The food tasted almost like cereal, and Shiro basked in remembrance of it.

The entire table had quieted remarkably as Pidge had talked, and now it was just silence. Shiro sighed. “I don’t know Pidge. I know it’s bad for his health, but I also get the feeling that if we try and move him, he will stick himself to that pod. All we can is really just wait.”

Pidge got up and slammed their hands on the table. “Really Shiro, is that all you have got? He is your brother for god sake! You can’t just let him waste away like that! I have already maybe lost two older brothers I won’t lose anoth-“ They stopped themselves as they realized that they had accidently called Lance and Keith older brothers.

Shiro wasn’t really surprised at all. They had been in such close proximity that he had also begun to look at them as some kind of family.

He understood Pidge’s reasoning. They needed to do something about Keith.

Shiro couldn’t bear to see Keith wasting away anymore.

So they made a plan.

Hunk and Shiro would try to lure Keith out. (They talked about him like he was some feral animal, but seeing as he had growled at them the last time, they had tried to get him out of the infirmary)

Pidge would be hiding nearby the entrance, ready to hack the entrance to the infirmary, to prevent Keith from getting in there. (He could get in if he was supervised. It would mostly just a barrier to prevent him hiding in there)

And Lance… Lance was still in the pod, so he couldn’t help. Allura was prepared, where Shiro and Hunk would lead Keith, ready to tackled whatever happened. (Because as mentioned, they had no idea where he would react)

Coran was… Doing something…? No one on the castle really knew, and they didn’t ask. Because they had all experienced asking him, and he would either make them help or launch into a great story about how he had gotten cleaning stripes. So they didn’t ask that often.

They started executing the plan an early morning, before breakfast, hoping that it would be easier to lure him out with food, but as soon as they neared the infirmary, that plan was pretty much busted.

Keith was still sleeping leaning against the pod. He had blood running down his chin, and there were tear tracks down his cheeks. Hunk stopped short when he noticed, having been sent in before Shiro.

“Uh, Shiro? I think we might have a problem.” Hunk said, and his was shook a little bit, seeing as it was the first time he had seen Keith in such a vulnerable situation. He looked weak sitting like that, his eyes closed.

Shiro burst in from where he had been standing and looked at Keith for the extent of one moment before he flew – almost flew at least – over to Keith’s side.

“Keith!” He shouted, his voice on the edge of cracking. He checked for Keith’s pulse and found it fluttering weakly. “Oh no. Hunk, get Allura or Coran! Now!”

While Hunk ran out, looking slightly green in his face (Shiro could only pray that if Hunk puked, he would wait to do it after saving Keith’s life) Shiro cradled Keith in his arms, trying to move him over to a medical bed, without hurting him too much.

That was when Shiro noticed that Keith had been sitting in a circle of bloody petals. He connected the dots pretty quickly.

“Oh, Keith.” He said, slightly like he was remarking on something stupid a sibling had done, and you were trying to calm them down. He said it so gently, Shiro wasn’t even sure he said it at all. The realization overwhelmed him.

Keith had Hanahaki.

Shiro’s almost brother had Hanahaki.

Keith had hanahaki for the blue paladin.

And then another reality.

If Lance never woke up, Keith would ultimately also die.

**V**

One more word before I break

Look before you fall from grace

Read my lips and shut your face

Maybe you’re the one to blame

Same old story every day

Trip and fall and run away

The truth is gonna find you

It’s burning up inside of you

**Say Goodbye by Krewella**

Keith came to in a flurry of motion above him.

He could feel blood drip slightly from his cheek, and he could feel himself being moved. He knew that if blood was dripping from his mouth that something must have gone very bad, but his memories from just before he woke up were slightly blurred.

He did remember sitting in the infirmary with Lance, so he guessed that if he was being moved right now, he must have been noticed by the rest of the team, and was now being examined.

Keith couldn’t find it in him to have the strength to sit up and protest, so he simply looked at the loft, trying not to think about the strangling pain in his chest.

Shiro moved into Keith’s field of vision, and slightly tapped Keith near his ear. Keith reacted by moving his pupils to his ear, but he found that he couldn’t hear anything they said.

Keith slowly moved his hand up to his ear, and drew it away, noticing blood running out. Damn it.

The stems must have somehow connected to his ears, or something else must have cut him. He couldn’t hear anything at least.

For now it didn’t matter why to him. All he knew was just that he couldn’t hear.

Someone must have come up with the brilliant idea – after noting that he couldn’t hear – and had found something they could write on to tell him what the hell was going on. Keith just felt exhausted and it took him a while to register what they were writing.

**We are gonna put u out. Stay put. We need to cut the stems at least a little bit. You idiot.**

There was a small drawing at the bottom of the paper, resembling in very accurate lines, the small Pidge that appears on screens Pidge tries to hack, so Keith guessed that it was them that had written and had come up with the idea.

Keith didn’t like syringes, and he had the feeling that “Putting him out” meant sedating him, but he guessed that anything would be better than the feeling of these stems clawing their way out of his throat with their claws, and how badly he wanted to scratch them, and break open his neck if only-

He stopped his thoughts, as much as he could, before he got too carried away, and made a weak thumbs up to Pidge, signaling that he was okay.

He wasn’t okay though. He felt horrible. He felt like he couldn’t get enough breath, and he felt like he was slowly dying and oh god he wasn’t watching over Lance anymore, what if something happened?

He coughed as he thought of Lance, more flowers and stems forcing their way up his throat, and he distinctly saw the entire team take a few steps away to let him finish as he puked and hacked up a mass of blood and petals, landing not far from him on the floor beside him.

He feel back down onto the medical bed, and he felt the distinct prick of a syringe piercing his skin very quickly and his breath rasped out through his teeth as he slowly began to calm.

He was still conscious for a while though, and the others knew this, because they didn’t begin to try and tame the vines immediately. Instead the stepped back and let Shiro sit by Keith for a while.

Keith’s hearing was ringing, but he could hear what Shiro said very weakly, but he almost already knew what his brother would say.

“Why didn’t you tell us? If you had just told us, we… we would have figured something out. We can hold it off until Lance wakes, but… If he doesn’t wake, Keith you will die! I thought I warned you, but… Keith I can’t lose you. So please, just don’t die.”

Keith couldn’t say much, but he felt his eyes burn slightly. He hadn’t thought about what it would mean if he died, what it would do to the team. He had simply just assumed that he was replaceable, that Shiro would just take over for him.

But he hadn’t thought about that it would definitely hurt Shiro, knowing that his little brother had suffered and had not come to him, and had not tried to get better. That he would now have to take said little brothers place, because his little brother hadn’t tried to save his life.

That he would lose Keith the way he had lost Adam. (Yeah, Keith knew that losing someone to death, wasn’t the same as a break up, but Shiro couldn’t talk to Adam, so it felt like pretty much the same)

Keith felt himself loosing consciousness to the sedatives, but before that he managed to say something to Shiro, even if his mouth hurt just to move, and his breath smelled horridly of flowers. He could almost imagine the way the blood was stuck to his teeth. But he had to say this, in case he didn’t get to say it when he woke up again. If he woke up.

“I… I didn’t tell you.. because I knew you would tell me to man up.” Keith broke off to cough, Shiro not even moving as he was sprayed slightly with blood and petals. “And I can’t… tell Lance because it would mess up… our friendship.”

Keith didn’t have the chance to say anymore before he fell into the deep abyss of darkness, not feeling his body anymore and feeling free.

Shiro looked at his brothers unconscious body, and felt a tear trailing down his cheek. He was afraid of losing him. Keith looked worse now, than when they had found him. He was pale and small, his mouth covered in residue from the petals and blood. There was so much blood. On the bed, on Keith and on Shiro.

Shiro, who had never been particularly squeamish, felt like he might puke.

Hunk already had.

Pidge moved closer to Keith together with Coran, who looked remorsefully at the mess – probably thinking about how he was going to have to clean it later, but he had not earned his cleaning stripes for nothing – and Pidge looked to Shiro.

“This might get bad. You sure you want to stay?” They said, nodding toward the door, where you could clearly hear Hunk puking, making comments in between of how he was “fine and he didn’t feel like puking anymore” but then proceeding to puke even more violently, but Shiro shook his head.

“He is practically my brother.” He said. “I want to stay with him.”

Pidge shrugged, trying not to look bothered by what they were about to do, but failing under Shiro’s dad look. They took a deep breath, and stuck their hand into Keith’s throat. Immediately the sensor that Coran had plugged in began going nuts, all screaming about how that Keith wasn’t breathing enough and about how his heart rate had accelerated fast. Keith opened his eyes – the sedation not having held apparently – and appeared to be almost choking. There were tears in the corners of his eyes and Shiro raced up to hold him down as Pidge continued.

Pidge was already doing what they had to do, so there was no time to find some more sedative for Keith. They would have to do it with him conscious. Coran was standing ready with a tray ready to grab whatever loot (Maybe loot wasn’t the best word for it) Pidge gave him.

Pidge went to work, the sound of Keith struggling and choking becoming background noise, as they reached down as far into Keith’s throat as she could, and pulled. They used their nails to try and loosen the stem, they had managed to grab onto, and when it was loose enough, they pulled with everything they had got.

Pidge could feel something pricking into their hands, but that didn’t stop them, as they pulled out a massive stem decorated with small purple flowers around it, and thorns looking sharp and ready to cut something.

Keith was slightly delirious with pain, but he registered that the giant flower thing had come down from his throat and his eyes widened, pain clouding them, before he passed out, blood leaking from his mouth. He wasn’t bleeding much down there anymore, or if he was, it wasn’t coming up, the blood that was currently leaking was blood that Pidge had dragged up with the stem.

Pidge placed the stem on the tray Coran held, and began trying to get Shiro to move him. “We need to get him in a pod, to heal the punctures in his lungs, and in the wounds in his throat caused by the thorns. It should also prevent the flowers from growing so fast. If we keep him in there until Lance gets out.” Pidge moved their glasses further up their nose, making them shine with light. They then moved their gaze to lock with Keith’s. “So they can talk.”

Pidge left the room, mumbling something about how they were going to shower, because “This mix of blood and flowers was fucking disgusting.”

Keith wanted to protest, but he could see how exhausted everyone was and he knew he didn’t stand a chance against Pidge, even if they had left the room. They hadn’t asked for him to contract this disease out in space, in a place where there wasn’t an opportunity for surgery, or when the one he had contracted it for, was unconscious and might die. Shiro had even warned him about it, the disease being it, and still Keith had gone out and fallen in love.

He had gone out and done the one thing he had promised himself not to, the one thing  he had tried to avoid all of his childhood, because falling in love only meant pain.

Keith almost wanted to laugh. He was such an idiot.

Shiro nodded, acknowledging what Pidge had said. Then he looked at Keith, with a question mark in his eyes. “Do you want to clean up too, before you go in?” He asked, and Keith nodded again. He didn’t talk; he didn’t need to. He was just tired.

Shiro helped Keith move to his room and stayed, holding onto Keith as Keith turned on the water and tried to bathe. Keith wasn’t able to stand by himself, so that was why Shiro stayed.

Keith couldn’t bring himself to care. He had a hard enough time trying not to think about Lance, not to think about the thought of how Lance’s lips would feel on his. He coughed as the Sharpshooter returned to his mind, cursing the day the universe had decided it was a good idea to invent Hanahaki.

One of the reasons whoever created the universe was a horrible f*ck.

The water felt great on Keith’s skin, rinsing the blood of. He even opened his mouth to let the water in, only to spit it out, leaving a trail of watered blood and broken flower petals on the floor. He couldn’t look at Shiro.

He couldn’t bring himself to do it. He didn’t want to see the disappointment on his brother’s face. Shiro had warned Keith about it, but Keith had walked into the trap anyway.

Into the beautiful trap that was the Cuban brown-haired, blue-eyed boy.

Keith winced as he felt something scratch at his lungs again. Damn his brain. He should really stop thinking about him.

Keith looked to Shiro, hoping he would have some advice, before remembering his thoughts from before and trying to turn away, but not before he noticed the look of grief in Shiro’s eyes.

That was what made him break.

He hadn’t expected to see Shiro cry.

Tears spilled down his cheeks, mostly covered by the water from the shower head. But Shiro still noticed, because Keith pushed away from him, falling to the floor, holding on to a wall, as he slowly pulled himself to sit on the floor, water flowing down over him.

“I am sorry, Shiro.” Keith managed to say, his voice low and tired. He was so tired of this game of love and hurt. He was so tired, he didn’t want to do anything other than sleep now

Shiro kneeled down beside Keith. “What are you sorry about, Keith?”

“You warned me about all of this, and I still fell. I am such an idiot, and now you’re going to los-“ Shiro stopped Keith from talking by putting a hand over his mouth. Keith thought for a moment of how Lance would probably be annoyed and lick the hand, but Keith didn’t do that. He could feel a cough coming up in at the thought, but he swallowed to keep it down.

“Don’t you dare say that, Keith. I am not losing you now. You’re going to be okay, when you have talked to Lance. So don’t give up.” Shiro said, only then letting go of Keith’s mouth, but only to tug Keith into a hug. Normally, Keith would have complained teasingly about Shiro’s metal shoulder, but then he didn’t mind.

“It wouldn’t matter. Lance doesn’t love me. I would still die, Shiro.” Keith sighed, relaxing in the hug, having accepted his fate already. “It’s okay. I have already come to term with it. I just… I just wish it would be different.”

Shiro shushed him, and pulled him in further into a hug. Keith coughed a sight bit, and a small petal fell out. Shiro saw it, and pushed Keith away slightly.

“Stay there, I will be back with a healing pod suit. Just stay put. And don’t think about him.” Shiro sent one last stern look toward Keith, before leaving the bathroom.

Keith sunk back toward the wall again, feeling tired and happy to be alone for the first time in a while. He tried to keep his thoughts away from Lance and did succeed a little bit. He was still in the back of Keith’s mind, but Keith thought about other things that came with death.

Like how he might never meet his mother.

Or how he might never grow old with Lance and be-

Keith coughed again, a few more petals coming up. Okay, that wasn’t his fault. The thought had sneaked up on his, like he was pray, and it was a predator.

Keith leaned back and closed his eyes.

He must have fallen asleep, because he opened his eyes to find a very panicked Shiro looking down on his. Keith noticed that he was still naked in the shower, the water having been stopped by Shiro’s panicked hand.

Keith grunted, pulling himself up. Shiro didn’t say anything, only gave Keith a slightly relieved look, before helping him dress in a healing suit.

Keith grumbled a low “Thanks,” when they were done, and Shiro helped him back toward the infirmary. They didn’t talk, but Keith didn’t cough either on the entire way back, making Shiro relived. The red paladin had at least succeeded in not thinking about him.

Pidge and Coran were waiting for them at the pod, Pidge dressed in fresh clothes, and their hair was slightly wet. They looked at Keith. “Are you ready?”

Keith nodded, and sighed. “Let’s just get it over with.”

It wasn’t that Keith didn’t hated being in a healing pod, he just hated the way the mist in the pod would make his brain go foggy, the fog not leaving for days after having been in a pod. It clouded his brain slightly, making his filters blurry, which Keith did not like. He liked being in control of what he said.

Keith moved toward the pod, glancing toward Lance’s still form in the pod beside him, but he quickly glanced away again. That wasn’t a good idea.

He stepped in and the pod closed around him. He didn’t move much as the fog rapped around him, and dragged him into unconsciousness.

 

**VI**

I've been so into your mystery  
Is it because of our history?  
Are you into me?  
When it feels so good, but it's bad for you  
Can't say I don't want it 'cause I know I do  
Come on over, I need your company  
Cravin' that synergy

**Love Lies by Khalid & Normani Kordei**

 

Lance didn’t really know what was going on, the only thing he knew was the sound of a pod opening and the feel of falling, and being caught by something solid, but soft.

He felt disoriented, like fog was clouding his every thought. He didn’t even register really what it was that he was falling out off. He opened his eyes and blinked a couple times, as he looked up to see who it was that had caught him.

It was a blurry mess, but after a few blinks, Lance could see enough to determine that it was Shiro who had caught him. Lance could faintly see Shiro’s face set in a frown, his expression all in all looking worried. Lance wanted to ask what he was worried about, but he couldn’t make his voice work, so he only shot Shiro a small smile; Or hopefully what looked like a small smile, Lance wasn’t sure he had control over his muscles anywhere right then.

Shiro sent a small smile back, not completely hiding his worry, and held onto Lance as they moved slowly toward a medical bed. Coran had already warned Shiro, that because Lance had been in the pod for so long, that it might take some time for him to be able to talk again. So Shiro didn’t press him.

When Shiro had put Lance down, Lance looked around the room slowly. He couldn’t see details very clearly, but he could definitely see that another healing pod was in use. He didn’t immediately question who was in there, instead tried to work at how to speak again.

Shiro shook his head. “Lance, you don’t need to hurry with speaking. Just take it easy, okay?”

Lance nodded, conveying that he understood, but he still fought for his voice. Pidge rolled their eyes, as they saw his sorry attempt and put a sketch pad in his lap. Lance knew that this was a pad that they used to sketch their new ideas and inventions, so he gave them a small smile, feeling honored that they had given it to him.

Then he began to write on the paper; **Who is in the other pod?**

His lettering was shaky at best, his fingers slightly locked up, but at least it was readable. Lance knew that if he hadn’t been new out of a pod, Pidge would definitely have bullied him for his handwriting, but Lance also knew that they wouldn’t do that in his current situation.

Shiro looked from Lance to the pod that was active, and took a deep breath. “It’s Keith.”

Lance looked from Shiro to Pidge, wondering if this was some joke. Last he remembered – which honestly wasn’t much, his memory was still extremely hazy – Keith had been fine, but the again so had Lance, and a lot of things could have happened in the period of time between his last memory and him waking up from the pod.

Lance looked at the pod and was finally able to see the shape of Keith. There was some dried blood on his chin. He looked sad.

The expression on Keith’s face made Lance remember the events before he had been in the pod. He remembered the feeling of being hit, and he remembered faintly wanting to confess to Keith, but not getting to do it, before passing out.

He remembered the feeling of helplessness and the fear of dying.

Lance began breathing hard in present time, caught in the flashbacks of the event. His breaths were ragged, harsh against his unused voice.

**Relax Keith, I got this. You should be more worried about you reputation as a great swordsman, when I win over you in this bet.**

Lance fought to keep his breathing under control, but couldn’t do it, couldn’t focus on anything other than the memories haunting him. He could distinctly hear Shiro scrambling to help, and Pidge shouting something, but he couldn’t make out the voices.

He felt the pain of being pierced, and heard the desperation of Keith’s breaths.

**Keith, I-**

His heart was beating like he was running a marathon and he felt too hot. His breaths were still going a mile a minute, he couldn’t stop. Lance knew he should try to keep calm, but the only thing he could see was a replayed version of Keith’s shock again and again and again.

“Lance.” The distorted word came through his fog of pictures of Keith getting hurt, Keith dying on that ship, and it would be his fault.

He felt cold hands on his cheeks, that forced his gaze up. At first, Lance thought he must be hallucinating from lack of oxygen, but every time he breathed, the face above him only became more and more visible. He could see a haziness of pain in the beautiful purple eyes he recognized from nights of looking at stars, the stars reflecting in them, and there was still a smear of blood on his chin, but at least those eyes were open and were staring at Lance.

“Lance.” Keith repeated, his voice a stone for Lance to hold onto, to be steadied by. “Lance breathe. Breathe with me.”

It was much easier to breathe for Lance, now that he could see Keith in his vision, him being okay. Lance didn’t think about how convenient it was for Keith to be released from his pod right after Lance, but Lance was too concentrated about breathing, not even able to focus on the blurry faces right behind Keith.

Lance slowly got control of his breath, and the world came into focus behind Keith. Lance slumped back on the bed as he breathed, feeling exhausted.

“Keith.” He murmured, his voice still cracking and he was still trying to calm himself.

Keith gave Lance a smile, but he looked tired too. He had no idea how long had passed since he had been put in the pod, and he felt disoriented. By the looks of Lance, he wasn’t alone.

When Keith had fallen out of the pod, it had taken him a while to remember what was going on. He had fallen straight onto the floor, not caught by anyone, since Pidge – who had been the one who had opened the pod – was panicking about Lance’s panic. They had done what they thought was right, since Keith and Lance was supposed to talk at some point, so why not now?

Keith had seen the situation happening in the other end of the infirmary pretty quickly and had to the best of his ability tried to hurry over there. He had rubbed the back of his head, trying to discern the ache there from falling on the floor.

Keith didn’t remember much of what had happened after his run over there, but the next thing he knew, Lance and Keith were alone in the infirmary. He didn’t know where the others had gone, but he didn’t care right then. He knew he had to talk to Lance about his crush on him. He knew he had to clear it out, even if he didn’t want to, because Shiro was sure to lecture him if he didn’t.

But Keith wasn’t exactly the best at talking to people.

Lance knew from the looks the rest of the team had sent Keith, that there was something they expected them to talk about, but Lance couldn’t think of what. He had some hopes, sure, but he knew Keith, and all of those hope Lance carried, didn’t feel like something Keith would say.

Keith had moved a little away from Lance, sitting on a bed right beside Lance’s. His hands were in his lap, wringing around not once standing still. He was nervous: He hadn’t had the time to give himself his normal pep talk – which he definitely needed in the current situation – and he definitely felt the anxiety rushing in his veins.

“What are you thinking about?” Lance broke the silence after having looked at Keith’s faces open emotions. Keith didn’t look at Lance. He could already feel the flowers lodging in his throat, Pidge’s work already almost undone.

Keith leaned back against the wall instead and looked up at the loft. He wished he was able to see the stars here. He knew that it wasn’t a possibility to do that; But he would have had it much easier to confess to Lance if he had the stars. (That was what he told himself at least)

“Too many things.” Keith said, and let out a deep sigh. Lance watched as he did and noticed how the movement made his mullet move slightly. He snickered, making Keith finally look at him.

It hit Lance how scared Keith looked. He looked like he was out of breath, his cheeks rosy, his eyes wide with fear. This made Lance question what the red paladin was going to tell him even more, the hope growing in his chest.

They stared each other down for a moment, until Keith looked away coughing. The sound broke something in Lance’s chest, a hole that grew as he watched Keith close his fist as he drew it down, the smidge on the back of his hand looking much like a blood stain. Lance began to worry, and tried to get up from the bed. It took him a while to get up and by the time he began to move to Keith’s bed, he was out of breath.

“Keith?” He asked, his voice hitching. Keith was adamant about not looking at him, the coughing fit before having hurt like hell. He knew that wasn’t a good sign. Lance continued, even if it seemed like Keith wasn’t listening. “Are you okay?”

No, Keith wasn’t okay. He was suffering all because he was so stupid and had gotten a disease for someone who didn’t love him back and never would. “No.” He simply said, flinching at the undertone of pain that was mingled with his voice.

The bed dipped as Lance sat down beside Keith. “Want to talk about it?” The sharpshooter asked, and Keith didn’t know what to say. So he didn’t say anything, trying to grab the words.

He breathed in and out. He would say it now.

“I love you.” He murmured, so quietly that he wasn’t sure if Lance heard him, except that he felt Lance stiffen slightly.

“What did you say?” Lance didn’t have any sign of emotion in his voice except for something Keith didn’t want to believe for. Hope?

He pushed Lance away and got up from the bed, and turned around to look at Lance. His eyes were filled with a fire mixed with ice, that told Lance that Keith was ready for rejection.

“I love you, okay? And you don’t love me back, which is fine and-“ He was cut of his rant with another cough, this time racking trough his body forcefully, and he fell to the floor, his knees hitting the metal of the castle hard.

Lance was sitting in shock, his heart running a marathon. He couldn’t find his voice, but his legs moved of their own accord. He ran over to the fallen boy on the floor and wrapped him in his arms. He put his head over the red paladin in-front of him, and tried to recover from the broken confession he had just gotten.

Lance knew he had to answer, because Keith wouldn’t believe him, if he didn’t say anything, but his tongue wouldn’t work. He was overflown with relief, but also fear. He knew these symptoms that Keith was showing. He needed to do something fast.

He looked around for something, and his eyes caught on the sketchpad lying nearby. He pulled away from Keith long enough to reach over and grab it and the pen beside it. He felt Keith’s eyes on him and he wrote, his tongue popping out the corner of his mouth in concentration.

Before he turned it, he looked at Keith again. His cheeks were red and puffy, his eyes streaked with red. His hair was unruly from hands running through it and Lance’s somewhat comforting. The worst part was his chin. There had been traces of blood there before, but now there was a thick streak of blood mixing with petals running down, hitting the floor in clunks.

Lance didn’t hesitate with turning the sketch pad, keeping it some distance from Keith (Praying he didn’t have problems reading from a little distance) to keep it from getting ruined by blood. Pidge might have leant it to Lance, but that didn’t mean he was about to demolish it.

**I like you too, Mullethead.**

It took Keith a while to read it, his eyes racking over the words again and again, as he felt the way his lungs became slightly less cramped and he drew in deep breaths. He didn’t believe it, but he was too busy breathing to pry from Lance if he really meant it. It felt for Keith exhilarating to breath probably again.

“Really?” Keith said, when he had finally gotten his breath back, still feeling slightly off. He peeking at Lance, with hopeful eyes. Even if he didn’t believe the Sharpshooter completely, he couldn’t help the feeling of hope rushing through his blood, like adrenalin, giving him energy for just a bit more.

He was met with two big, brilliant eyes shining down on him, a shy smile splayed on Lance’s lips. Keith’s eyes looked quickly down on Lance’s, but he forced himself to look into Lance’s eyes for just a bit more time, knowing the answer to his question would be answered in them. There wasn’t any doubt in them, only shining with admiration, and that was enough for Keith to lean in and kiss Lance.

Later, Keith would wonder if every kiss between them would feel the same, or if some part of the energy buzzing through his body was from the eradication of the bottom of the roots in his lungs, but at this moment his brain short circuited, the only thing he could focus on being Lance’s lips on his, the press of skin on skin. It was hot, and messy in the start as they figured out how to do it, and when they broke apart, they were both trying to catch their breaths.

Keith turned his face to the side, and held out a finger for Lance to wait a minute with talking before heaving onto the floor, leaving a mess of flowers and branches. He dry heaved for a minute, before wiping his mouth in his sleeve. They were both still wearing healing pod suits, but Lance couldn’t give any cares right now.

He could feel laughter building up in his chest and his fell back laughing. Keith shot him a look as if he thought Lance was sick or something, but Lance just waved it away and kept laughing.

The door to the infirmary opened and Pidge looked in. “I hear Lance’s laughter, is it safe to come in? I don’t want to watch you suck face.”

Keith looked from Pidge to the laughing mess on the floor. “I think it’s safe to say it’s safe. I am not sucking his face while he is dying.”

Lance stopped laughing just long enough to pout at Keith. “Wait what? Does that mean you don’t want another kiss, Mullet? And besides, you just kissed me while you were dying, so isn’t that a bit unfair?”

Keith gave him a long look, before sighing. “Fine. I definitely would still kiss you if you were dying.” The words were mumbled, and Lance took advantage of the fact.

“What was that, I couldn’t hear you? Were you actually acknowledging the fact that I was right? I could get used to this.” Over the time it had taken Lance to say this, he had moved closer to Keith, and was practically sitting in his lap, a giant smirk on his face.  

Keith was blushing ferociously as Lance came closer, but still forced himself to answer. “Maybe you should get your ears checked if you couldn’t hear that.”

Pidge groaned from somewhere in the background and Keith was reminded that they weren’t alone. He looked away from Lance’s captivating eyes to give a sly smile at Pidge. They were trying to break a record of the most eyerolls a minute, their eyes in a continuous loop.

Lance pouted. “Look Pidge, you ruined it!” There was no heat behind his words; Only teasing. Even if Keith knew the rest of the team was about to barrel in to question them and grill them, he just wanted that small moment with Lance to have lasted a little longer.

 Shiro poked his head through the door, and did a quick look over of both Keith and Lance, before stepping further into the room. The fact that he had done that made Keith blush in embarrassment. What did Shiro think they had been doing in the half an hour they had been gone? Sometimes, he acted too much like Keith’s dad. Even if Keith did see him as family, it wasn’t as a father figure.

Shiro stopped close to Pidge and the bundle of Keith and Lance still lying on the floor. “So, how did it go?”

Lance, who was really mature he defended himself afterward, made a Victory sign with his fingers, and stuck his tongue out. Keith smiled at Shiro.

“It went great.”

**Author's Note:**

> That was it! I hope you enjoyed and if you want, you can go follow me on Tumblr under the name @Foxwrites-blog and please leave Kudos and a comment with feedback!   
> Also, if you want to draw any fanart for this fanfiction, please tag me! I love seeing fan creations! 
> 
> Till Next time!


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